In our lives, few things cause more distress than serious conflict. If we don’t find a solution to that conflict, we become its prisoner.
When I begin mediation, the parties sit across the table from each other. Physically, they are within arm’s length. Emotionally, they are worlds apart. Whether the dispute I’m mediating involves divorce, employment, or business issues, I observe a wide spectrum of feelings: outrage, insult, misunderstanding, denial, betrayal, retribution. In these disputes, each side naturally feels that they are right and the other is wrong. However, mediation is not about ‘right’ or ‘wrong,’ but rather finding solutions which allow both parties to benefit.
The world reknowned existential philosopher, R.D. Laing, once said, “The easiest way out of the room is through the door. It’s amazing more people don’t use it.” My job is to help people find and open the doors that can resolve their conflict.
Mediation a process of give and take, and finding the right balance is hard work. But for those who are willing to sit down and mediate, a world of possibilities opens up and resolution is achieved.
For an illustration about how Mr. Gessner’s philosophy works in action, see his article: Worlds Apart.
CONTACT: Hal Gessner | hgessner@gessnermediation.com | (917) 453-5712